You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
