But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
