as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
vagina is talking i cant
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I lost the right to judge tonight
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
