Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
