his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
