I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
