He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
It all started with a game of naked twister.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
