I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
