chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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