You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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