I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
