$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
