U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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