Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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