in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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