No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
