At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
