yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
