ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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