I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
