Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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