Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
