It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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