he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
