I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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