i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
