apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
