Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
