think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
