so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
