Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
