I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Randomize
