So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
