I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
