Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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