So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
