they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
