There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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