doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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