Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
