Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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