Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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