Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
