i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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