got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
