I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
