Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
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