it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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