I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
