the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
